It's been a good while since I've "blogged." as April pointed out. So uh... here's an update on my life.

Pretty much, my life has been turned around completely the last few months. It's looking like i probably won't be going on that mission anymore... cause it's looking like i'm gonna be married this year.

Speaking of that, Mark McCann has pretty much turned my life upside down the past few months. He's everything i've ever wanted/needed in a guy and more. He's perfect for me. It's an awesome thing. I love it. I love him.

Recorded on another Jenny Phillips cd, this time the primary one. "I will follow God's plan for me". Jennyphillips.com :)

Off track right now. For my first job as something other than food service... a call center. Oh well, it's a job. I start fer real next week.

Night classes SUCK.

I don't wanna be allergic to cats anymore.

I can't stop eating these rainbow colored goldfish.

Happy 2011?

Cha-cha-cha-cha-changes! ba dum dum

Bout 10 days till i go back to Idaho land. Not sure how i feel about it.

More nervous for this semester than any other for some reason. Maybe it's just having new room mates. Maybe it's new classes. or the fact that i absolutely hate the wind in rexburg and snow and stuff.
Also, everyone always talks around me like "Oh em gee, that was the hardest semester i've faced. Wow. Crying every night out of stress. No friends. Boys spitting on me. Blah blah" and i'm just sorta... expecting a bad semester. SImply because everyone else has bad semesters here and there, so it's my.. turn? Which isn't logical-- i know whether i'm happy or not depends solely on my attitude. And i have a pretty good one. Just nervous.

Kinda feel like i don't belong in one place anymore. Guess i've been feeling like that for a while though. It's just starting to hit me harder. People are becoming home to me- wherever they are. Wherever cody is, or melissa is, or my sister is, or jamie is, or my parents are, or amy or marky or a few choice other people.... but places don't really mean much to me anymore. I'd love to just travel. Go on a huge awesome road trip to alaska or go to china and teach english or just serve my mission wherever they send me. I don't feel grounded anywhere anymore.

It's weird being grown up. I still feel like i'm a little 14 year old girl sometimes. But i'm almost 20. Big difference. I know people my age and younger that are MARRIED. My sister was married at my age. I'm not quite there yet, haha.

Got some awesome stuff coming up though. Recording with Jenny Phillips. Going back to Idaho. Meeting new people. Got no real reason to complain.

HA.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mn4C3i7H8MU&feature=search

If any man can watch this and STILL love me... he's a keeper.

word vomit

Three more weeks till i head back to iceland. SO excited. I'm super irritated with myself because i can't seem to.... be myself. Under certain circumstances. And i'd thought i'd grow out of it, but nooooo, babygirl still gets paralyzed. Very frustrating. I love (and by love, i mean hate) how potential things always pop up when i have to LEAVE. either leaving idaho or georgia, both happens. always. I really want abs. I'm glad cody's teaching me how to sing and play piano. and stuff. I bowled a strike tonight. As well as at least 8 in the left gutter. WHAT A WOMAN. Heard Avril Lavigne's hey hey you you i don't like your girlfriend no way no way think you need a new one song in seth's car on the way home. Its been YEARS. Awesome song. I tried walking on my friends crutches tonight. I asked what he would do if i just stole them. His response was something like "I would crawl after you forever..." and i died. Literally.

.....my contacts are flipping out.

growing up

Hung out with my good pal mel-oo-hoo tonight. Looked through a bunch of old pictures and letters and stuff together, and it got me feeling a tad nostalgic. Not that i would ever go back to those days- i'm quite glad to be moving on with my life. It's just.. weird looking back and remembering how... important everything seemed. Everything was "as good as it'll ever get" or "the end of the world." But looking back, time DOES heal all wounds, happier moments come again and again, and all of mom and dad and brinny's advice was right! (most of it).

I'll just go write a song about it instead of writing an emo blog.

Or write a haiku about it.

Growing up is good.
i was so naive before!
Yay for puberty.

p.s. i have had crazy whack hiccups. All. Freaking. Day.
I'm gonna count how many of them occur in the next 20 seconds.

... i should have expected not to hiccup very much when i told myself to.

and the winner is..... drum roll please!

SO HOLY FREAKING HECK CRAP.

Remember like. Two blogs ago when i mentioned that Jenny Phillips contest thing? That i was like "Psh, i'm not gonna win."

Well. Your girl won. 1st freaking place.

Let's have a moment of silence.

So this is what happened.
I was in a horrible mood cause i was trying to hurry and buy a braves game ticket online but it wouldn't let me, and i was SO sad cause i really wanted to see this guy i thought was gonna go (he didn't show, btw). So i'm trying to figure this out, and i get a phone call from some number.
"Hello?" i muttered in the most depressed, pitiful tone.
"Hey, is this Erica Verner's number?" my guardian angel responded.
"Yeah?" i muttered, still depressed.
"Well, this is Jenny Phillips. And i'm calling with some exciting news..."

Needless to say, i perked up quite a bit.
What does that mean, you might ask? Well, folks, that means that on September 1st i am going to record a song that will be on the next Young Women's theme cd that goes out to all the YW and stuff. And i'm pretty sure it will be sold in deseret stores and such.
I know it doesn't sound like that big a deal, and to people who aren't mormon it's definitely lame sounding, but I'M FREAKING HONORED. This is like, the coolest, best thing that has ever happened to me.

I'm still just.... in shock. This is insane. Stuff like this doesn't happen to me.

Maybe this will be like the movie Inception. Maybe Jenny Phillips is a projection from my subconscious, and this is all a dream.
I feel like it would be appropriate for me to end this blog with a little black thing spinning, then cutting it off to leave the suspense of if it's really a dream or not.

But i'm not gonna do that.

limbo land

Rough day, but i should have expected to have some trials come up in my life- my life has been TOO awesome the past 4 months. Mainly just cause i tried to have a good attitude about everything. I gotta work on keeping up that attitude even when life is ACTUALLY hard- not just "oh, he doesn't like me, he likes my room mate" kinda stuff. But the real mckoy. Or however you spell that. Yeah.
Ugh. I just wanna grow up. Move on. Go on my mission. Get married. Have twenty seven babies.
and i wish i could write songs easier- i don't have much inspiration these days, but i'm itching to write. But it's hard to write about something unless i'm like, super duper sad or super duper happy. And it 70% of the time needs to involve a member of the opposite sex. And since my love life sucks, but doesn't suck quite enough for me to write a legitimate song about it, i'm out of luck!
well, not completely. i tried writing part of a song earlier... but the situation is too.... unrelatable to other people. So i gave up for the mean time.
meh. maybe i'll write a song about being in limbo land.